Who I Hope to Be...

I haven't written anything in my little spot in the blogging world for a couple weeks. It's intentional. I've logged in and logged out. Read through my list of favorite bloggers (but never comment) I've jumped on twitter and poked around. I'm just hanging out... with no plan. I've even started a couple blog posts but then deleted them... what gives? Has this ever happened to you? You have so much to say but don't even know where to begin? You don't know how to organize your thoughts into a meaningful post? That's where I am at. I'm also trying to figure out my voice on this blog... do I want it to be a collection of pictures and video's and small thoughts here and there? Do I want it to be where I write down some meaningful posts about meaningful things going on in my head? Do I want it to be a thought catalog of random whatever, or a lifestyle blog where I plug in a bunch of pictures of my daily life.... I just dont know. I would like it to be more of a meaningful blog where I can go back and read through what was going on in my life at that time. I think it's more authentic and I want to be more authentic.

So in an attempt to be more authentic, I want to share with you who I hope to be... I am constantly changing and evolving and the one thing about me is my mind is never stagnant which is a good and bad thing. I hope to always grow and evolve no matter how scary it may be. I hope to never settle because it's the easy thing to do. I hope to always stand up for myself, because if I don't who will? I hope to always push myself to do better and to be better. I hope to always try to handle myself with grace. I hope to to continue to work hard in my job because I have always reeped the benefits of hard work and dedication. I hope to never settle. I hope to continue to understand how much I've grown in the last 2 years and how the choices I have made, no matter how difficult, have been the best decisions I have made. I hope to grow in my marriage to be a better person and wife to Mike, I hope we continue to grow closer and closer to one another everyday and appreciate the good and the bad about each other. I hope to be the kind of mother I had(have) growing up, I hope our son grows up knowing how much he is loved and how much I want to see him be the best person he can be. I hope to be the kind of mom who doesn't take the easy route in raising him. I hope to be the kind of mom who puts in the time, energy and effort with him so he raised the way Mike and I intended. I hope to be more patient and not loose my temper. I hope to be better at managing my home. I hope to be more organized and diligent with household chores, I hope to coming up with a system and sticking to it till it's stuck. I hope to try more things this year, I hope to find peace within myself. I hope to be more calm and let negative thoughts that creep into my mind to leave just as fast. I hope to be the best version of myself I can be. I hope to be more me than I ever have.

Who do you hope to be?